Thursday, January 27, 2005

There's just something about it...

That place...the's great.

It started out about the music and the dancing and has become so much more. I can't explain what it is, but going to the Cafe on Wednesdays is kind of like going home. It's familiar. It's fun. The people are like my family. More and more I'm knowing the majority of the people there. They notice when I'm gone. I love them. Each one brings a different nuance of happiness to my evening, and meeting a new person or two every week just amplifies this feeling. Every week is better than the next. Every week I love it more. I love to smile at Westside Johnny on the stage and have him smile back. I love dancing the same silly dances and making the same silly faces with my friends. I love the hoops. And I love the drums. It's really hard for me to imagine what my life would be like without the Cafe anymore. I hope I never have to worry about that.

In other news...
I'm cooking up a great big monster post on body image. It all started as something of a silly joke. Chris had an assignment for his English class that he was dreading. I told him I'd write it for him and he declined, but I decided I'd write it anyway. So I started doing a little research and gathering some information. Before long I remembered a story from my 5th grade year that proved a point exactly, but GEEZ what a long story. I'm still working on getting it out on paper. I may or may not attach the *actual* body image paper to the end of it - I may just let the story stand on its own. We'll see. Maybe I'll write both. After all...what else am I going to do but write? It's another one of my favorite things.

And finally...
What is my silly mind up to these days? Just waiting. I've decided that is my "plan" for now. Just wait. I'm not trying to change, influence, or actively seek an end. I just want to wait. I've taken a good long look at myself and come to appreciate what I am and what I offer. I see myself in the mirror and see someone that has the capacity to love without bounds. I see someone who deserves to be loved unconditionally as well. As much as I wish one of a few key people in my life would see this wonderful opportuinity and pounce on it, I am going to wait. If they don't see the great life that they could share with me then they don't deserve to have it. I will wait. I can wait. Someone will come along who is just the person for me. Someone will come along and will love me like I love him. And life won't be perfect, but it will be close.

Practicing patience,


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