Friday, September 10, 2004


Okay. I guess if I'm going to get all personal in this blog I might as well go all the way and tell you what I'm really thinking.

I've been so unsatisfied with my marraige for so long, it is SO good to be putting it behind me. But here is the problem. I am a warm-blooded American woman. I have NEEDS! But...I'm not looking to jump into anything major right now for sure. So what is a girl to do? Since boys are boys, getting laid is NOT a problem. I could walk into any place and pick up SOMEONE but I don't want to. I don't want something meaningless and quick. I don't want someone who I will never see or speak with again. BUT I don't want someone who is going to want me to turn around immediately and get into another relationship.

There ARE good men out there - I know a lot of them. I just don't think that any of them are looking for something like that from me. There are even a couple of good prospects out there, but I either keep missing them or I'm just too chicken shit to make anything happen!

I will admit to this into the dark void that no one really ever reads that I am currently quite enamored with one particular individual. He's everything that I ever wanted - physically, mentally, the works! I would rather spend time with him in my day than any other person that I can think of right now. He makes me happier than anyone in the world right now. But this is the biggest problem I've got, too. I'm not ready for someone so damn perfect in my life. I'm not ready for someone who could possibly take my heart away again. But, geeeeez, I really really want him.

Any ideas out there?


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